Starsky Owen was cleared today of all charges relating to his January 28th arrest in Round Rock. The incident, involving Kool-Aid and markers, was classified as “a misunderstanding” by Owen’s agent, Cranky McCrooked. At a press conference announcing his client’s release, Mr. McCrooked said “Yeah! Take that legal system!”
According to a prepared statement, the Barracudas are “relieved that these troubles are behind him” and that “we support Owen 100%- but not any more than that. We’re not one of those teams that supports our players and impossible 110% or 120%. 100% is as high as we go. Well, okay, 98% is really as high as we go, but there’s got to be room for improvement, right?”
Owen is expected to rejoin the team in time for Wednesday’s game against the Dell Troubleshooters
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